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Those Questions You Get Asked By Distant Relatives And How To Answer Them

Greetings, all!

You know those questions that most kids get asked sometime in their life by well-meaning great-aunts, distant cousins, and the family dentist?

Yeah, mm-hm. Those questions. The ones you get tired of answering because usually the people who are asking don’t even care about the answer; they just ask out of politeness or because they don’t know what else to talk about with a kid.

I hate those questions. With a passion.

So, I decided to think of different answers to give when I get asked those questions, and I’m going to share a few with you. I can’t wait to see people’s reactions when I answer with these. It’s going to be priceless. XD

DISCLAIMER: Always remember to be polite, respectful, and courteous when you answer an adult; even if you’ve heard the question they are asking 100,000,000 times and are sick and tired of it.

Thank you. ;-D

Question #1: “What Grade Are You In?”

Normal Answer: “I’m in 10th grade.”

New and Improved Answer: “I don’t agree with the Government School’s system of segregating kids into different grades based on their ages. I learn at my own pace in my own time; and I think my mind is all the more fertile for it.”

(Smile, and look them in the eye!)

Question #2: “What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?”

Normal Answer: “A writer (or doctor, or policeman, or whatever).”

New and Improved Answer: “Most people don’t stay in one profession for their whole lives, so I’m not even going to plan my future life. Whatever God has in store for me is what’s going to happen. I could be a mom, a writer, a missionary, a nurse, an astronaut, a musician, the wife of the president, or even a super hero!”

(Throw your arms wide open to show more emphasis.)

Question #3: “Do You Have A Boyfriend?”

(First off; why do you want to know and why do you care??? I’m probably only going to see you a few other times in my whole life; maybe even never again. Geez.)

Normal Answer: “No.”

New and Improved Answer: “Nope! And I’m never going to have one. If God’s plan for me is for me to get married, then He’ll show me the right man and we’ll get married. No need for me to go searching out a man; I’d probably mess it up pretty fast anyway.”

(Nod seriously here.)

Question #4: “What’s Your Favorite School Subject?”

Normal Answer: “English, History, and Science.”

New and Improved Answer: “I’m a student of the whole World; with aspects of all different topics appealing to me. Some of my most loved topics include the study of the English language and its grammar; learning about the roots of civilization; and researching how the universe is formed.”

(You have a good start to a conversation here, unless you scared them off. :-Z)

Question #5: “Who’s Your Favorite Teacher in School?”

Normal Answer: “My mom???” (Is that an answer or another question? Make up your mind, people.)

New and Improved Answer: “Hmm, let me think. Plato and Aristotle are great philosophers, but quite a few of their concepts are not Biblical. I enjoy Paul’s writings; along with those of Moses and King Solomon. C.S. Lewis, now there’s one; Mere Christianity is an amazing read. I would highly recommend it. My brilliant and beautiful mother is a wonderful teacher. Oh, and we can’t forget the greatest of all; God Himself! Oh, and I’m also kind of a teacher; I taught myself quite a few things including the guitar, reading, and every one of the great battles of Middle Earth.”

(Mike drop.)

I hope you enjoyed my little rant against normal questions!

Now, take up the sword, and fight!

Down with cliché teenage responses!!!


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  1. Oh my word, I'm still choking from Answer #5 XD That's glorious. XP

    1. XD I know; I was laughing when I wrote that. XD


    I'm totally trying these out soon ;D XD

  3. OMW HAHAHAAA THIS WAS SO GOOD HONESTLY XDD They'll be staring like "what when did this kid get so philosophical and wise ...??"

  4. Haha, that's an amazing post!! :D Really helpful! Well done, I loved this! <3


  5. Love this! Those questions are the worst. And then, when you graduate, you always get the questions, "So, are you going to college?" and "What are you going to do now?". It's great fun to say I have no plans on college and no idea what I'm doing yet besides writing. Great post. :)

    1. Haha, thanks! I know; they really are the worst, :-Z Oh, yeah; I haven't got those questions yet. XD

  6. Ahahaha, this was great! I really hate The Questions too XD especially the school ones, because then I feel obliged to explain that I'm homeschooled, which leads to all sorts of other questions such as, "oh, does that mean your mum teaches you?", "do you follow the curriculum", "where do you take your exams" or my own personal favourite, "do you have any friends?" *facepalm* (Like?? I'm a sixteen-year-old girl?? Of course I have friends?? I mean, not loads of friends, but still? What kind of a question is that?) XD Anyway, I love your answers! You should definitely use these and see people's faces when you do... XD

    1. XD I know; and then you end up having a thirty minute discussion about homeschooling. :-Z I think I am going to! It's going to be awesome. XD

  7. Awesome post, MEM!:)

  8. LOL I loved this. Good responses! Though in order to use them I'll have to memorize them, or maybe I should keep them as notes in my pocket to pull out whenever I need them and creep people out... as if I was expecting the questions... XD XD

    1. Thank you!!! Haha, or you could write them on your arm. XD

  9. I love the snarkiness :) Great job, MEM!

  10. Those are good, confident answers Mem! Only I am in a real grade and have real teachers, so 😜

    1. Thank you, Zella! Nice; then you can answer those questions with real answers! XD

  11. OH MY WORD I'M DYINGG XD These are great! Really wished I saw this before yesterday... That way I would've had a decent answer for my Nana in relation to question #3-- instead of staring at her like a deer in the headlights! XD

    (Speaking of that, what would your improved answer for the question "Want me to find you a boyfriend?" be? ;D)

    1. XD Haha, thanks! Ooh, yeah; that must have been awkward.

      (Hm, let me see; maybe "Um, you know what; I think I will wait for God to find me one first, if that's okay with you." XD)

    2. You could say, "I don't want a boy friend, I would much rather have a husband someday." I've had questions like that. So awkward!!

  12. I'm so late! But these are great answers! I can't wait to use them XD Thanks, MEM!


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