You know those questions that most kids get asked sometime in their life by well-meaning great-aunts, distant cousins, and the family dentist?
Yeah, mm-hm. Those questions. The ones you get tired of answering because usually the people who are asking don’t even care about the answer; they just ask out of politeness or because they don’t know what else to talk about with a kid.
I hate those questions. With a passion.
So, I decided to think of different answers to give when I get asked those questions, and I’m going to share a few with you. I can’t wait to see people’s reactions when I answer with these. It’s going to be priceless. XD
DISCLAIMER: Always remember to be polite, respectful, and courteous when you answer an adult; even if you’ve heard the question they are asking 100,000,000 times and are sick and tired of it.
Thank you. ;-D
Question #1: “What Grade Are You In?”
Normal Answer: “I’m in 10th grade.”
New and Improved Answer: “I don’t agree with the Government School’s system of segregating kids into different grades based on their ages. I learn at my own pace in my own time; and I think my mind is all the more fertile for it.”
(Smile, and look them in the eye!)
Question #2: “What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?”
Normal Answer: “A writer (or doctor, or policeman, or whatever).”
New and Improved Answer: “Most people don’t stay in one profession for their whole lives, so I’m not even going to plan my future life. Whatever God has in store for me is what’s going to happen. I could be a mom, a writer, a missionary, a nurse, an astronaut, a musician, the wife of the president, or even a super hero!”
(Throw your arms wide open to show more emphasis.)
Question #3: “Do You Have A Boyfriend?”
(First off; why do you want to know and why do you care??? I’m probably only going to see you a few other times in my whole life; maybe even never again. Geez.)
Normal Answer: “No.”
New and Improved Answer: “Nope! And I’m never going to have one. If God’s plan for me is for me to get married, then He’ll show me the right man and we’ll get married. No need for me to go searching out a man; I’d probably mess it up pretty fast anyway.”
(Nod seriously here.)
Question #4: “What’s Your Favorite School Subject?”
Normal Answer: “English, History, and Science.”
New and Improved Answer: “I’m a student of the whole World; with aspects of all different topics appealing to me. Some of my most loved topics include the study of the English language and its grammar; learning about the roots of civilization; and researching how the universe is formed.”
(You have a good start to a conversation here, unless you scared them off. :-Z)
Question #5: “Who’s Your Favorite Teacher in School?”
Normal Answer: “My mom???” (Is that an answer or another question? Make up your mind, people.)
New and Improved Answer: “Hmm, let me think. Plato and Aristotle are great philosophers, but quite a few of their concepts are not Biblical. I enjoy Paul’s writings; along with those of Moses and King Solomon. C.S. Lewis, now there’s one; Mere Christianity is an amazing read. I would highly recommend it. My brilliant and beautiful mother is a wonderful teacher. Oh, and we can’t forget the greatest of all; God Himself! Oh, and I’m also kind of a teacher; I taught myself quite a few things including the guitar, reading, and every one of the great battles of Middle Earth.”
I hope you enjoyed my little rant against normal questions!
Now, take up the sword, and fight!
Down with cliché teenage responses!!!